Marriage is not Easy, Break ups are not Pretty

Terry McMillian, one of the most profilic African American writers on the last 20 years is divorcing the man who in many ways cemented her celebrity. Somehow after the showers and the hot sex, the boy toy from the islands has turned out to be SGL.

Reality really bites sometimes.

Now I must admit I do not like McMillian's work. I find them to be shallow and overly melodramatic. But they are entertaining to listen to on tape because she is a good reader and she uses good readers. My eyes rarely see her stuff.

I must further admit that while I have never seen "Waiting to Exhale" in its entirety, I loved the idea of the movie, and I loved how the four women looked on film. (Thank you Forrest Whittaker) How Stella Got her Groove Back...never phased me much probably because I am not convinced that June and January matches are optimal. But as is the case with most of life, I believe in live and let live.

What's frightening and particularly ugly about this case is that Mr. Plummer just recently discovered he was gay. Hmmmm I hope someone can explain that to me. And then J L King, had to dump his two cents in on this as it further exploits his downlow theory.

Well fans of McMillian I feel a book coming on, and this one will be a blockbuster, my car CD is anxiously awaiting the release.

Damn It's Hard Being Black.

Oprah Winfrey, one of the wealthiest women in the world, host of a long running daytime television talk show, on the cover of a magazine every month and one of the most recognizable faces in the world was denied entry to a posh Paris boutique.

Why? The store reported it was having problems with North Africans. In other words, they treated Oprah like a negro. I am humored by this tidbit and I am angered at the same time.

Could it be that some trailer park princess could get better service because of her skin hue than one of richest women in the world?

One of my favorite bloggers summer m. recently listed her ugly light skinned people and it was mad funny but after reading this I wonder if we will ever overcome this race thing.

Damn, Oprah can't spend thousands on a handbag and I'm upset. What is up with this?

Interesting Things Black People Do

My Daughter is Possessed

A woman called me last night.

"Gibs, my daughter is reprobate."

"What?"

"My daughter is the walking biblical definition for reprobate, there is nothing she won't do to torment me."

"Wow."

"Did you ever see the movie "The Exorcist?"

"No, I don't like horror flicks."

"My child is Regan."

"How old is your child again?"

"She's 41."

"She ain't no child, she is a grown ass bout to be old ass woman."

(Laughing) "You right about that. Do you know what that heifer did? She took to the house of the woman my husband was supposed to be having an affair with? Can you imagine a daughter doing that to her mother?"

"June, you were ranting about that crap for months, you probably got on her nerves and she wanted you to do something about it or shut up. I almost did the same thing."

"No it's worse than that. She is trying to destroy me. You know I have bleeding in the brain, diabetes, high blood pressure, and now my knee is acting up. I'm going to have gastric by pass surgery to help me lose some of this fat. She is killing me."

"Look, June, let her go. She is 41 not 14 and she has had two children and those negroes are almost grown. You want to be healed, turn her over to Jesus and stop worrying about her."

"She don't want Jesus in her life. In fact I was trying to pray with her and she said 'Fuck that shit.' I almost shot that heifer, talkin bout my Jesus."

"Jesus ain't worried bout your daughter talkin' bout him. Girl, don't you believe that God is almighty?"

"Yeah but--"

"Nothing. You always saying you like the woman with the issue of blood, well touch the hem, damnit. we been waiting to see if you can be made whole."

"Gibs, you don't have a lot of compassion."

"See, Junie, you need tough love. So does you daughter now I gotta bounce I want to watch my fourth episode of Law and Order on TNT. See Ya."


My Father Abandoned Us--A Father's Day
Tribute


On Sunday our Pastor, allowed the church school children to give gifts to all the dads in the congregation and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. But then to my horror He gets up and said. Oh I forgot, we need to share tributes to Father. Anybody want to share a tribute to dad?

"Reverend, I would like to have some words."

The Pastor looked a deer caught in the headlights.

"Oh of course Sister Tracy. Please share."

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I screamed silently.

"Thank you Reverend. My Father abandoned us when we were little. And because he died before I was 11. And his leaving left us on public aid. But we would see him from time to time, going in and out of other women's houses and playing with other women's children. But he was okay with us because at Christmas time he always sent us a box. In the box were apples and oranges and used socks and panties from the Goodwill. But he was our father and he lived a difficult life like many black men."

"Thank you Sister Tracy."

Every year she gives that same damn tribute and she really brings the day down.

"On that note, let's hear from the choir."

Amazing Grace

Ain't God All Right

Ramblings...

I am much too old to be a blogger. My life is much too drab to talk about. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I've been married to one woman for a wonderfully long time and she is the mother of ALL of my children. Thus I know, love and like my children.

God has been good and I need to be better.

I was reflecting with an associate that gospel music is truly going old skool. Everybody is singing old skool these days. In my opinion the best stuff on Donnie McClurkin's new CD are the old church medleys.

I guess it goes to show that the stuff written to honor God is the stuff that lasts.

I am also praying this morning for the unborn progeny of woman who is living via artificial means. She is dying of cancer that is virtually growing in her body as the child grows in her womb.

The race between time and cancer has me praying for the family who is hoping that the cancer does not penetrate the placenta and consume the child.

"My hope is built on nothing less...than Jesus' blood and righteousness"

I am praying for an 81 year old man whose grief at the sudden death of his 40 something daughter trigger a massive stroke. Last night in the ICU, I held his hand and he held mine tight

"I dare not trust the sweet frame but wholly lean on Jesus name."

I am praying for a 50 something woman who went in the hospital to have her bladder removed, and ended up wearing not one bag but two. Everything that could go wrong short of cardiac arrest and death, has befallen this woman. Yet through it all she has trusted in God. She asked why and then said it does not matter God is still good. On Thursday the doctors operated to reconnect her intestinal function so she will live with the one bag. Her surgery went well, now we are praying for her post op recovery.

"On Christ the solid rock I stand, All other ground is sinking sand."

Sunday is Father's Day and although my Father is not one of favorite people. He taught me everything not to do. My wife, my children and I are grateful for the lessons.

"All other ground is sinking sand."

Black Defendants 2 Clarence Thomas 0

In two separate cases the Supreme Court overturned the conviction of Black defendants convicted by all white juries in cases where Blacks were summarily dismissed during jury selection.

The interesting thing about these cases is that in the Texas case an inmate facing execution had his conviction overturned in 6-3 decision with Scalia, Rehinquest and Negro Tommy in dissent.

The other case was a California case where all the justices except for Negro Tommy were overwhelming convinced that California's rules for determining jury bias were too strict.

On another issue

I watched Nancy Grace or something like that on CNN tonight. Is this chick for real. She acted like a fool on television after the Jackson verdict. What is up with her?

People Who Need People on the Down low

I have some real issues with the terms people have for themselves and each other. And I guess my biggest problem is with the term dl or down low or on the low.

I betcha got a chick on the side, sure you got a chick I know you got a chick on the side.

First, everybody acts as if this is some great revelation. Negroes please. People have been keeping certain things close for a long time. There is a man I know who has buried two wives. He has something like 12 children. He is in his 90's now. But each time a wife has died his children have met new siblings.

The first wife died in his 40's and when she died it was revealed that he had been in a continuing relationship with another woman for the past 14 years and there was a daughter born to the union who had known her daddy all of those years. She was also told that she could not reveal who her daddy was. So Pops knew, the woman knew, the kid knew and from all reports, the wife never knew. Everybody had an agreement and it worked for them.

I betcha got a chick on the side, sure you got a chick I know you got a chick on the side.

The children of the wife were at first shocked then they accepted it, because what else could they do?

He later remarried and had a new family with the second wife. Low and behold when she died history repeated itself. 45 years after the first revelation Pops had done it again. What is amazing is that Pops does not live in a major metro area. He lives in a small city of maybe 150,000 where most of the blacks know each other or of each other. In fact Pops never lived more than 10 minutes from other woman 1 or other woman 2.

I betcha got a chick on the side, sure you got a chick I know you got a chick on the side.

I heard some family members become quite critical when it was revealed that Pops had done it again, after all he is a deacon in the church. He was the first one to rail against Pastors with roving eyes, and voted to keep unwed mothers from singing in the choir or ushering while they were pregnant.

The family members accused Pops of being a hypocrite and of being whorish. Others said that Pops was just living biblically. He had a wife and a concubine. What's wrong with that?

I know that this dl fever is mostly directed at Men who have sex with Men (MSM) but straight men know and play this game with verve and panache.

And they secretly thank God for J L King because he took the pressure off and the tradition continues.

The question remains was this a bad thing Pops did? Did anybody get hurt?

Bad who knows? Pops was a horrible father to all his children. He worked hard to support these multiple families so he spent no time with any of them and he is surprised at 90 plus they have no fond childhood memories of him. The children to some men of his generation where the concern of women and his relationship with his adult children reflects that dynamic. They all talk about their late mothers and only talk about the rampages of Pops.

Did anyone get hurt? I don't know.


I betcha got a chick on the side, sure you got a chick I know you got a chick on the side.

Playing Tag with Summer M.

Total Number of Cd's I own: The exact number is undetermined. However I know it is atleast 250 because I have two one hundred cd cases full to over flowing and I have a shoebox full of stuff. And since I am so old I also remember at one time owning 876 albums. The only reason I don't still have them is because they cost too much to move.

The CD or album I bought: Actually there are two. Kurt Carr's One Church and Donnie McClurkin's Praise Hymns and Spirtual Songs and both are still wrapped.

Last CD or album I listened to: Musically one of my Home by Stephanie Mills. I also listen to CD's on Audio Disc. I just finished two. The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom: I am glad I did not invest myself in reading this book. It wasn't bad or good just unnecessarily bland and for me it lacked any thing that was meaningful to me. The concept was interesting and a lot of people talked about it.
The second was Fear Itself by Walter Moseley, since I never have time or make time to read novels, this is how I get them into me. I was driving with my daughter to college and it was a great way to spend six hours. This was not Moseley's best and it was somewhat predictable and far-fetched but it was fun to listen and Don Cheadle did a great job.

Currently listening to: Gotta Have Gospeel! (Part One) I love gospel music!

lyrics or beats? I am an old school guy for real its lyrics.

First album you fell in love with?There are two. Diana Ross and the Supremes Greatest Hits and Aretha Franklin's Amazing Grace. Those two Dee-troit divas just rock for me. And if you ever wanted missed church, Amazing Grace was the album to remind you just how much you missed. Working with James Cleveland and that Southern California Community Choir dressed in African attire on the jacket, Aretha reminded us of those things that brought us through and brought us as an oppressed people over.

Diana and the Supremes exemplified a different side of the hopefulness in some black people in the sixties which included inclusion. The music was inclusive and it the only people it left out were those who could not fathom the fickleness of love.

I love Detroit.


Album with the Greatest Impact: No question Stevie Wonder's Songs in the Key of Life. From top to bottom this was a classic album and in it Stevie broke every barrier and every rule and in many ways paved the way for another important album for its musical impact Michael Jackson's Thriller. And for defining the diva, Patti LaBelle's If Only You Knew, gave the diva name power and grace at the same time.

Favorite Album: I really don't have a favorite album. I love a couple of songs so much that they never leave me. First, Home by Stephanie Mills, Mary Don't You Weep by Take Six. If I had to choose an album it would a two record set by Al Jarreau Look to the Rainbow. Another favorite single. And I am Telling You I'm Not Going by Jennifer Holiday. These were singer's albums.

Damn this is hard work.

Most listened to album: Wilmington Chester Mass Choir He Shepards Me. It is my faith story every song means something to me. I won't turn back is my favorite.

sexiest album Marvin Gaye's Midnight Love and I Want You.

biggest disappointment Whitney Houston. Whatever happened to the beautiful song bird that made sappy crap sound good. The diva who reworked Dolly Parton's song and killed America and made them act cool with an interracial love story?

five albums that mean the most to you: In David Letterman Order.

#5 India.arie Voyage to India Simply beautiful.

#4 Al Jarreau Look to the Rainbow

#3 Earth Wind and Fire That's the way of the World

#2 Luther Vandross The Night I Fell In Love

#1 Anita Baker My Everything. This sista has staying power. She did not release new stuff for TEN YEARS and was still able to fit right back in her niche.

Honorable Mention Aretha Franklin's Jump To It. (Another great comback LP)

That was fun.

Some Christians Get on My Nerves

Okay, enough is enough, today Texas Governor Perry signed a restrictive abortion measure today. That is not what is upsetting me. I am pro-life but since I have no intention of adopting or raising anybody's baby, I am pro-choice, because people have to do what they have to do. If God is upset, I trust God to handle God's business.

What has me mad is that he signed the bill in gymnasium of a Christian high school. What kind of mealy mouth pandering is that. The Christians ought to be up in arms that a governor of a state would come into their no-choice arena and sign a bill that still allows abortion of any kind. I mean if you are going to be no-choice do not compromise. This Republican pandering to the right wing evangelical movement is dangerous because it runs the risk of affecting the separation between church and state and this is a battle the church might lose.

I am not opposed to Christians being involved in politics. For years Christians have been leaders in the fight to eradicate social injustices. But this bill should have been signed in the governor's office or on secular ground. The good Christians who supported this mess could have moseyed up with governor right there. To bring this bill to the Church is a travesty to all Texans, Christians and otherwise.

Why am I so upset by this bill? Because it now imposes parental consent on girls who were grown enough to give up the poon-tang to boys old enough to produce seed without mama and daddy's permission and now it takes the pressure off little hot mama and her baby daddy and puts the pressure on Mom and Pop.

Damn, if my little hotass tramp daughter (Okay I know that is a bit rough okay my no thinking no protecting little heifer gives it up and gets strung, she got herself in so she should be the one responsible for making the decision to get out of it.

Doggone it, I am sick of parents getting blamed when their almost grown ass children do stupid feces. And now I am sick of the government telling me I got to decide if my daughter gets an abortion. Oh wait a minute, I don't live in Texas. Thank you Lord, I know there must be a God somewhere.

What I like about Love

Love is weird, kinda squishy often hard.
Love is simple, but simple ain't always easy
Love makes some folks really queasy.
Love makes me wanna walk and shout and dance all at the same time.

I love complicated stuff. Because I am complicated. I can be nice and I can be nasty and I can talk trash and be really sentimental.

I am in love, with the idea of love. Wait I know I need to make up my mind. But I think I have it all figured out.

I am in love with Condoleeza Rice. I wonder if she ever asked her mama why?

Condi is sexy woman, it must be the power. She has replaced Pam Grier
As the ultimate female fantasy. Well maybe a morphed Condi with Pam's bust.

Langston was right

Love was like a dream until I woke
Now that I am broke.

The White Man Who Loved Black Women

Recently in the St. Louis metro east suburb of Belleville, Il a white man and his black female lover were slain allegedly by her husband.

The deceased man was a man who loved black women. All of his life he desired black women. Ugly black women, fat black women, skinny black women, beautiful black women. Black women with nappy hair and black women with weaves. A couple of times he even fell for black drag queens by accident he claims.

But his true penchant was for black married women. Why? Who the hell knows. But he loved his black women married especially to black men.

He died when the killer stabbed him and his married woman in her apartment. His daddy an almost racist, said I knew messing with nig--I mean blacks would kill him.

When he died he had one of the weird funerals. His funeral was in a white funeral home, and the eulogist was you guessed it a Black woman. His pastor from the yes right again, The Colored Methodist Episcopal Church (okay I know they is Christian now but they started off Colored)

The preacher said the dead man was a unique individual. He was a drug addict, a sex addict, but he was loved by God. (Okay she did not say it like that but that's what she meant)

Why don't I call his name. Well, I did for we never really called him by name, he was always the white boy who loved sistas. There was a great deal of affection for him. Because unlike some brothas he really loved his sistahs in any shape, size or hair texture.

RIP with a sistah if God knows the you, you were.